On Friday morning, I’ll be flying to Vegas to spend the weekend with one of my best friends. No husbands, no children, no dishes to clean or laundry to do for three days. Squeeee. We’ll hang out, talk, wander, look at god only knows what, make fun of strangers and eat in restaurants with no kid menus. I’ve been looking forward to it for at least six weeks now.
Here’s the thing though, the person I’m spending the weekend with, is someone I’ve never met. You all know that I went to BlogHer and I met a bunch of you there. I’ve met a few other people at random times. I have yet to actually meet Liz. Mostly, because she lives about 1237 miles away from me. It’s hard to get together for coffee (which she doesn’t even drink) or ice cream or something, when someone lives four states away. So, we are going to VEGAS.
I think it was sometime in April or May when I first “met” Liz on Twitter. I’d been friends with her brother in law for four years. Friends, meaning I have stalked his blog and made a nuisance of myself over there for four years. In January I realized that his brother, Liz’s husband was on Twitter and starting busting his chops on a daily basis. Really, whats the fun of harassing one brother, when you can harass two brothers?
At some point one of them told me who she was and I followed her, only to instantly feel bad, when I realized she’d been following me for months. We starting talking back and forth on Twitter, which led to multiple DM’s one night and then talking on Gmail chat. It gets fuzzy at this point, because we basically talk most of the day. What can I say, she doesn’t think I’m insane. Or if she does, she hasn’t told me yet. Now she’s stuck with me.
I couldn’t not ask for a better friend. Truly, I am thankful every day for her. She’s helped me through a ton of crap in the last few months. More than that though, the girl makes me laugh, daily.
At some point we realized that we are Twins. Long lost, Internet twins, from another mother. Truly, the similarities sometimes still shock us, which at this point it really shouldn’t.
I’ll tell you a few random things about Liz, because I’m mean like that. I’d send you to her blog, but she almost NEVER blogs. Like, hai March was the last time she did, I believe. Okay, fine May. You can follow her on Twitter, but she isn’t on often. Maybe every third day. Might be my fault in some ways, because when she asks me what is going on today on Twitter, I tell her. I might should be like, go see for yourself. But? I’m an enabler.
One day she told me that she’d been reading my blog for a year, and my previous one as well, without so much as a single comment. Not one. I still give her a hard time for that. Often. Dude, we could have been long lost Internet Twins for years. Now she comments every few posts, but I yell at her, because she’s generally talking to me, as she is commenting. Silly woman. (Actually though, I do love comments.)
She has a score of 178,400 on Bejeweled right now. No matter what I do, she beats my score. Every week it resets itself and I get one decent score. Within an hour, Liz ALWAYS beats my score. I doubt I will ever beat her. However I will continue to try.
On Twitter, she occasionally says things like this, which make me love her even more: “It’s possible that I just woke up my napping daughter by burping. Loudly. I am *SOOO* lady-like.” She neglected to mention on Twitter that her daughter was upstairs in her crib, when this happened. Also: “Uh, guys? I know kung fu….” Which I’m not sure why she said it, but now I’m thinking I might should be scared.
A few years ago, I may have thought that meeting someone you’ve never met on the Internet is the weirdest thing in the world. Now I still find it to be weird. What? Just being honest. Ha. No, really, a few years ago, I wouldn’t have done this. I wouldn’t have even considered it. If you don’t believe me, ask all the people who wanted me to go to BlogHer in 2006. I told them all they were nuts. Now though, I wish I’d gone. Now, I can’t wait to meet my lovely friend who I talk to all the time.
Now I am just excited. A tiny bit nervous, cause what if she suddenly doesn’t like me? What then? But really, I’m just glad that I get a few days away, to hang out with my friend.
Only in the past few weeks have I started looking at his picture in the hallway. It’s right outside of the hallway/girls bathroom and hard to miss. His big smile looking back at me, hasn’t been something I’ve been willing to look at until just recently. Before then, when it happened to catch my eye, he never failed to make me cry. There was just something about that picture. It was too real. Maybe I was still grieving too much. I don’t really know. Now I look at it and grin. Not because it hurts any less today, just because I miss looking at him.
He had a great smile, my Grandpa did. A smile that could light up a room. He didn’t smile often, he was a serious man. However, when he did, his smile was infectious. The picture on my family wall, is of him and my Grandma, taken when I was about 14 years old. I’m not sure why I have that one up. No, I take that back, I do know why. It’s that smile. He didn’t always smile like that in pictures, in fact he normally didn’t. Grandma once told me that the man taking their photo that day, had told Grandpa a joke.
We talked about him a lot this past weekend, my mom and I. As much as I miss him, she misses him a million times more. He was her father after all. This coming Saturday it will be a year. On Saturday, the man who I adored, the man who I saw as the strongest man in my life, will have been dead an entire year.
My first real memories of my childhood are from a trip when I was three years old. I remember my brothers being born and visiting them in the hospital and I was only two then. But my real solid memories are of this trip. My dad and Grandpa helped move my Aunt and Cousins to Texas from California. My dad drove the moving truck, my Aunt her car and my grandpa drove his car with my Grandma, my mom, my brothers and I. I sat on the hump. Can you imagine letting your three year old sit in the front seat, much less the hump in between the drivers and passengers seats? Me neither. It did have a seat belt though.
I sat on the hump and sang with Grandpa for 1300 miles. Truly, I did. Until the day he stopped talking, which was about a year before he died, he told me this story ever time I saw him. From then on, he and I had a great relationship.
I miss him. I miss him more than I can even tell you. He was a major player in my life. He had more influence than my dad ever did, on my life. It hurts to think about him most days. It still doesn’t seem real. He’s been gone, a few weeks longer that Harrison has been alive. He never met Harrison. As sick as he was, as bad off as he was in that last year, I’m not even sure it registered that there was going to be a Harrison. That makes me sad. Grandpa loved all the babies. He loved kids. Heck, he had six of them. He adored his grandchildren and his great-grandchildren. He’d of adored Harrison. In a lot of ways, Harrison is a lot like him. Very serious little dude, he is.
I nearly named Harrison after him. I would have if he’d been born a few months later. At the time, I just couldn’t see saying Grandpa’s name every single day. Plus, H’s name really fits him.
A year has passed. Now he’s gone. But he’s not forgotten. He and my Grandma’s death, left a hole in this family. Our grief is still huge. My girls still tell me on a regular basis, I’m sad because I miss my great grandma and great grandpa. Me too, my babies, me too.
To you Grandpa, loved and never forgotten. Love, me
This is going to be a crazy week for me. I have nine million things to do in the next three days, before I go on vacation on Friday. There is likely to be a lot of posting this week, because this is a pretty significant week for me. It may make up for the lack of posting in the past few weeks. Or by the weekend, you’ll be like, dang she’s long winded. Make her stop. Hehehe.
-My mother and MIL were both at our house this entire weekend. It was great actually. The kids were entertained, I got to rest a ton and try to get back to feeling better. I didn’t have to cook or clean for three days. Logan and I had a date night last night. We went to the Taste of Colorado, went swimming twice and had a BBQ on Sunday. Hai, I’m tired now.
-I apologize to the patrons and employees at MiMi’s Cafe yesterday, for the um…poop. That was a new experience for me. I mean, I’ve had to deal with some poop in my day. But the explosiveness of it was um, impressive to say the least. Let’s put it this way, I’ve never in my life had to carry my son into the bathroom, still in the high chair. Wooden high chairs clean right? Really, truly, I apologize.
-This is the first day, I’ve been able to taste my coffee in a week and a half. The first day, I’ve felt even a bit better. I may just live.
-Thank you to each of you for your kind birthday wishes to Logan. I read them all to him the other night. He had a good, if not totally laid back birthday.
-Netflix movies that we saw this weekend were: Escape to Witch Mountain, which I thought was okay, but nothing compared to the original, which we own; Revolutionary Road, which I never should have added, since I didn’t like the book; and Hancock which we all thought was hilarious. Thanks for the suggestions last week, I added them all in.
-My children will be listening to THIS SPEECH by President Obama today at school. I personally find it INSANE that people truly think there is anything wrong with this. I just want to shake people sometimes. How is it wrong for our President to speak to children about staying in school? How is it anything more that that? I remember several times as a kid watching a speech in school, by a President. It was never anything as great as this. It’s all about education, staying in school, believing in yourself and finding what you are good at in life. How is any of that brainwashing our kids? I just don’t understand. I find it really bassakwards that people would keep their children home from school today, because of this. Sigh.
So, how was your weekend? What do you think about this speech today?
September 7th, 1994-
First day of my freshman year, third period English is when I first met him. Tall, gangly, wild hair, handsome. When I saw him, I leaned over to my best friend and said, I’ve got dibs on that one. He walked in late so our teacher made him tell the class about himself. Name’s Logan, just moved here from Denver, goal in life is to learn to surf. Oh and today’s my birthday.
She sat him right next to me. He’d not even fully sat down when I handed him a note. I’m Issa, wanna ditch with my friends and I after lunch? I’ll teach you to surf. A big smile and a nod was his response.
I taught him to surf that day. I also gave him shit for the entire afternoon when he told me he’d lied. His birthday was actually the 5th. It was just something to say, she put me on the spot was his response to me.
There was something about him. It was like I’d known him forever, even though we’d just met. He was the nicest, sweetest, funniest guy I’d ever met. We dated from that day forward.
September 5th, 1998 –
At the beach in Santa Monica, sitting on the swings at midnight. We’d spent the day together. We’d had dinner with his family, cake with mine and coffee later on with friends. What else would make this the perfect birthday, I asked him? Not sure anything could top it, he said. Hmm, what if I asked you to marry me, I asked?
Are you serious?
Yes, I am. I am dead serious. Logan, will you marry me?
You know it’s supposed to be the guy who asks the girl to marry him right? I had it all planned.
We’ll that’s fine, you can do that. But answer me first. Will you marry me?
Of course I will. I’ve wanted to marry you from the day we met.
*The rest of this story has been edited, because this is a family blog. Please feel free to think what you’d like. Actually don’t, that’s gross. Forget I said anything. About a month later he proposed to me.
September 5th, 2001 -
Laying in bed, after having a huge birthday dinner with family and friends. He’d spent all day go-carting with our brothers, while I purchased every single baby pink outfit in the world. What do you think she’ll look like, he said as he patted my belly? We’d just found out Morgan would be a girl.
I don’t know. I hope she’s tall and athletic like you, I said. I hope she has the shape of my eyes, but your nose and mouth for sure. And your mother’s ability to cook, I added.
With your sense of humor and kindness, he said. We both laughed at the thought of her coming out a mini chef.
I just want her to be happy, he says to me. I don’t care what she does in life, just promise me we’ll raise her to be happy. We will love, we will. I swear to you. We’ll make sure she has a great life. That’s my birthday promise to you.
Can I ask you for another birthday gift, he asks me, right before I fall asleep. Of course honey, what? I’d like her middle name to be Elise, after my cousin. We can name her Maya* like you want, it’s a beautiful name. But instead of Olivia, as her middle name, I’d like to honor my cousin. Can we do that?
Yes babe. We can. Maya Elise it is.
*Yes, this is Morgan’s real name. Shrug. Elise was Logan’s cousin who died from cancer when she was seven years old. He was nine when she died.
September 5th, 2008 –
September 2nd, 2009 -
Late Wednesday night, in bed.
Me: I’m sorry my plans for your birthday didn’t work out so well.
Him: Meh, it’s okay. You know?
Me: Babe, it’s your 30th freaking birthday, it’s supposed to be HUGE. I’ve kind of failed on the HUGE part.
Him: I’d rather be here with our moms and our babies and celebrate that way. If I’d had the choice, I’d of said that.
Me: Hmm, I guess I didn’t really ask you what you wanted did I?
Him: No, not really. It’s okay. I wouldn’t have minded two days away with you. This is just better. It’s like the universe intervened for me.
Me: I’m sorry.
Him: Don’t be my love. Don’t be. One birthday request?
Me: Of course, anything you want. Within reason, I add…because I saw that evil glint in his eye. LOL.
Him: On my birthday, I’d like us to have a sleepover with the kids. One night only, but all my babies in one room.
Me: Okay. That I can do. And hey, it’s even free. It’ll be crowded you know?
Him: Crowded is good sometimes.
Me: Okay then. Birthday wish granted. Do I still have to make you a cake and buy you a gift?
Him: Only if you want one next year for your birthday.
Me: Point taken. Guess I’ll be buying making a cake tomorrow.
*I got so lucky. I don’t know what I did to deserve this man, but I’m glad I have him. Whose 30th birthday wish is to let the kids sleep in their room? He doesn’t want a party, he didn’t really want to go away for the weekend, he just wants a weekend with his family. There’s nothing better than that.
Happy 30th birthday tomorrow babe. I promise to wait at least a month week day to mention that you are now older than me.
Love, me
We put Netflix on hold about 9 months ago. Every 90 days or so, I’d get an email and it would ask me if I wanted to remain on hold. Somehow I forgot it this last go around. I don’t check the email it goes to very often. Note to self: START DOING THIS.
Anyway, we were charged today and now have three movies that I’ve never heard of coming our way. Which is all well and good. However, I’m at a loss with movies right now. I am sure there are tons that we never saw or ones that we saw in the theater and never thought of again, that I’d enjoy.
This is where you come in. Without you, I will aquiest to my daughters and in seconds my Queue will be filled with Hannah Jonas goes to jail for trying to be too much like Brittany movies.
What have you seen lately that you loved? What have you not seen that you thought looked good by the previews? What is your favorite movie of all time? What is your favorite TV show that is on DVD? I realized today, there are tons that people adore that I’ve never seen a single episode of.
Hook a girl up, will ya? It’ll be cold here very soon, so I’ll likely leave Netflix on until Spring.
ps. No scary flicks please. I mean, you can mention them, but I won’t watch them. Am big wuss.
pps. Yes, I know, two lame posts this week. Promise I have something real soon. Once I get over the plague and can get it out of my head.
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