I’ve been doing this a long time. Two and a half years this go round, two years the first time. I took an 18 month break in between. (Which had absolutely nothing to do with this community and everything to do with my family issues in the moment.) That is pretty much ancient in blogger years. I’ve watched a ton of amazing bloggers shut down. I’ve seen people just disappear. I’ve made friends, lost friends. I’ve been treated like I don’t exist, I’ve treated others that way I’m sure and I know I said somethings over the years that I wish I could take back.
This is a big community. A great big, amazingly awesome community. It also has it’s downfalls. Just like anything, I suppose.
I have, in the past week, read six different posts about people who feel left out. People who were saying they don’t get included. People saying that they don’t get comments, that they don’t get invited to events, that there is no way for them to have the friendships that some of us do. On Twitter, it’s the ever popular emu attitude: no one talks to me, no one responds to me, no one is reading my post. I guess, I’ll just go because I’m not really here.
Can I be honest here for a second? It’s driving me freaking insane. I am tired of it. Seriously, I’ve seen all of this in the past week.
I want to scream at people, this is not High School. This community is what you make of it. You find your people, if you are genuine and patient and friendly. It does not necessarily come easy. You surly can’t expect it to happen.
But the jealous, poor pitiful me, I am so unpopular and nobody likes me posts are annoying. It reminds me of that song, nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I’ll go eat worms. My five year old likes to sing that song…mostly to taunt her big sister. She’s generally holding out a worm as she sings it.
Those posts were annoying five years ago and they are still annoying today. Maybe it was BlogHer selling out of tickets last week, that has made all of that talk start. Maybe it’s something else. I’m not really sure. I don’t think all of us should not be allowed to talk about BlogHer though, because other people don’t like it.
It’s made me pull back a bit this week. It, along with some other things have made me a little gun shy. Gave me a bit of writer’s block. I think the reason is because I’m wanting to say some things that may make me very unpopular. It’s okay. I don’t mind. I am tired of being nice and ignoring it.
Obligations. Big bloggers. Small bloggers. Popular. Interesting words that seem to be thrown around a lot lately. Especially in the past week or so. Loralee wrote an amazing post on the subject at BlogHer this week. It’s well worth the read. Her previous one was on jealousy, which I found even more interesting. Truly the comments over there are enlightening.
Personally, I think that people expect too much. You start a blog, you comment elsewhere, you hope people comment on your blog. You start a Twitter account and chat with people, but somehow they still don’t come and read your blog. I can’t tell you why. I can tell you that you can’t expect it to happen. You can’t force it to happen. You can’t force online friendships. If you try, you just come off as whiny and annoying.
I have been accused of being elitist this week. I’ve lost a friendship, because I wasn’t willing to let something go that I felt wasn’t okay. I’ve also been made to feel guilty, for basically being me. Each of those things, by a different person. I guess I could take it really personally. Some would. Mostly it made me wonder about what peoples expectations of me were. It made me wonder who feels I’m obligated to do things, because I have tons of ‘friends’ online. It made me wonder, if people feel that I owe them something, then imagine how many people someone like Her Bad Mother or Redneck Mommy or say Dooce have thinking that they are somehow owed.
I don’t know that I have any answers for that. I can however, tell you what I know.
Making friends online? Takes time. Just like in real life. Because guess what? This is real life. You will click with some people, you won’t with others. Some will think that they “know” you, because of what you share online. That doesn’t necessarily make it true.
I blog because I love to write. I love the online community that I’ve found. I adore the friends that I’ve made. I love commenting, I love comments.
I comment on “popular” blogs. I comment when I want too. I don’t when I don’t. I comment when I have something to say. I comment on some, because I’ve been reading them forever. I do not expect a return comment. If some of them read my words over here, that is great. Do I tweet at people who never tweet back at me, yes. I do. I tweet at people who don’t follow me. I’m okay with it. I only say something, if I have something to say. I also happen to be very wordy.
I also comment on blogs that no one else reads….yet. I only read people, if I want too. I read some blogs that I never comment on. I sometimes comment on blogs that I don’t have in my reader.
I have trouble keeping up with my reader. I have friends on Twitter whose blogs I don’t read. I have trouble reading what my friends write, much less being able to physically read every blog written by someone who comments or tweets at me. It is not possible.
I have a lot of online friends. I have a lot of online acquaintances. There is a difference.
I have friends who I could text, email or call at anytime. However some of those people? I can go weeks without talking too. My friend Kari and I can literally go weeks without talking. However, I’ll be sharing a bed with her at BlogHer in August. She is someone I’d call to help me hide a body, if the need every came up. It’s just life. She’s busy, I’m busy. I know where she is though, if I needed her.
I have two friends, best friends, who I talk to all the dang time. They mean the world too me. I don’t know what I’d do without them. I would do just about anything for them. The fact that we happened to meet online, stopped mattering long ago. It took me a long time to find them though.
I am going to BlogHer this summer because I want to see my friends. A lot of people say they think BlogHer is so clique. I was there last year, I didn’t see that. What I saw was people spending time with their friends. I went up to many big name bloggers and said hi. Every single one of them was nice too me. I introduced myself to many people who had no idea who I was. I was thrilled when some people did know who I was.
The people who came home and complained? I truly feel that they expected too much. They also expected people to not want to spend time with their friends and only spend time meeting new people. It’s never going to be that way. Some of us will only see our friends this one weekend a year. Think about that for a second before you take it all so personally.
I was nice to every single person who came up and talked too me. I still spent the majority of time with my friends. But hey, I made new friends while there too.
I use Twitter to talk to my friends. I would not expect anyone else to use Twitter in any way, than how they want too.
Just because you come here and read my words, doesn’t mean you know me. You know parts of me, yes. I share more than some people do. It still doesn’t mean you should expect me to do anything, except be a decent human being. It also doesn’t mean that you can come and tell me what to do, or how to be online. I’m a Taurus. I don’t like being told what to do. If we are friends, or you comment often, I love hearing your opinion. But the random people who show up and like to tell me what I should be doing? Are not okay. It’s just not okay.
Here’s the thing I guess I’m going to end this long rambly post with. We are all adults. Adults with lives offline. Spouses, children, jobs, responsibilities. You can’t expect this to be people’s only life. Those few people, who get paid enough to call this their job, are few and far between. It still doesn’t mean they are obligated in some way to each person who reads their words. Blogging by in large is still a hobby.
This community is great. I don’t know where I’d be without it. I’ve spent a lot of years in it. But it is what you make of it. It is not High School. It’s not. Those who act like it is, need to realize it is them who believes it is. It is them who makes it feel that way.
79 Responses to It’s only like High School, if you let it make you feel like High School
Grab My Button!
I’m a joiner
**Wolf whistles, standing ovation, thunderous applause**
You rock my world, girl.
love you.
.-= avasmommy´s last blog ..Girl Talk Thursday – Dinner For Under 10 Dollars =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:01 pm
@avasmommy, Love you too friend. Hey? FYI. I’d hide a dead body for you too.
You’re right, I don’t know you. But I’m pretty sure you’re not elitist.
I really enjoyed this post. Thanks for writing it.
.-= drlori71´s last blog ..My Little Hoarder =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:00 pm
@drlori71, It has been decided that I’m an elitist about Starbucks coffee. but I can handle that.
You hit it on the head, girlie!
I think a lot of times, people want to be “famous” on the Internet…I’d rather be famous to my family!
That’s all I currently have to say! oxoxox You done good, Kid.
.-= Heather´s last blog ..Giveaways Make Tuesday Better! =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:00 pm
@Heather, Fame and fortune…well I’d take the fortune part. But i don’t want to be famous.
YES! (I’m too sick to say any more. Ugh.)
.-= Headless Mom´s last blog ..The Crud =-.
ROUND OF APPLAUSE!
.-= Becky @TheRealBecks´s last blog ..For Layla Grace =-.
Way to go. This was a great post.
I know in the beginning I felt it was like high school but then as I got used to the internet world, I realized I’m not going to connect with everyone, just like I wouldn’t in real life. I’ve found my own way, made my own connections and turned this virtual world into a place I love.
.-= But Why Mommy´s last blog ..Hope =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:56 pm
@But Why Mommy, Hey, we met in a sea of 1,000 people last year and that is just awesome.
I don’t know you, but I wish I did
I’ve been absent for a while now due to this and that… life in general. Just started reading blogs again and I might even get around to restarting mine (tomorrow, tomorrow…!)You’ve got enough going on in your life right now without worrying about anyone else. I did spend an afternoon catching up on yours this week though. Holy crap girl! You still wanting songs? Was driving today and heard a song on the radio and thought of you… ‘White Flag’ by Dido…. sad but with spirit. Could think of loads more but I guess you’ve been inundated. I’ve been where you are now… hang in there *Big hugs* x
.-= Sandy´s last blog ..Another One Bites The Dust =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:53 pm
@Sandy, HI!!!! I’ve been wondering where you went off too. Glad you came back.
I think everyone has moments where they feel left out or jealous or unaccepted. The problem is when people try to make their own feelings someone else’s problem. No one is responsible for how a person feels except that person — and that’s the only person who can ‘fix’ it. Believing or acting otherwise is highly codependent behavior. Good for you for not falling for it.
.-= Kelly´s last blog ..My little Adonis =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:53 pm
@Kelly, Love this. Thank you Kelly. So very true.
Yes! Yes! And YES!!
OMG, it’s about time someone said this.
The internet is like life. You get out of it what you put into it. I’ve never understood the ‘I have a blog, so no everyone should love and read me’ attitude.
Oh, and YOU? Elitist? Really?? *snort*
.-= PrincessJenn´s last blog ..Follow Friday – Book Bitches =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:52 pm
@PrincessJenn, It has been said. However, Allyson and I decided this morning, that I’m only an elitist about Starbucks. I’ll gladly take that title, cause it’s soooo true.
Thank you Jenn. I’ve been thinking about this for a long time.
PrincessJenn Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:00 pm
@Issa,
Ha! Well in that case, sign me up as a total elitist because I’m a Starbucks whore all the way.
.-= PrincessJenn´s last blog ..Follow Friday – Book Bitches =-.
I think maybe this is the reason why I find it so hard sometimes to give this community 100% of myself. I work in a high school–I don’t need to relax in one, too. Or maybe I’m just commitment phobic. It could totally be that, too.
.-= Allyson´s last blog ..Today =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:48 pm
@Allyson, Both maybe? Maybe time? Although the time spent last summer on farming… ha.
Here here!!!
.-= Jill´s last blog ..Gratuituous Cute Baby Video in 5…4…3… =-.
…. or is it “Hear! Hear!” ?
Whatever… you get the gist… or is it gyst?
Now I’m confused. Great…
.-= Jill´s last blog ..Gratuituous Cute Baby Video in 5…4…3… =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:48 pm
@Jill, Not sure. But thank you.
Yes yes yes. Last year was my first year at BlogHer, I felt small and silly at times, but I also made incredible friendships and solidified others. I met you at BlogHer last year and I had not heard of your blog before. But I immediately started following you on twitter and reading here (even if I’m a crappy commenter) and if I got nothing out of BlogHer, this would be enough.
This community is like any other, you can’t control it, you can only contribute and see what happens.
I write for me now, and it is liberating.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:47 pm
@Overflowing Brain (Katie), I write for me too. Mostly.
I was so overwhelmed at BH last year Katie. When we meet this year, please don’t hate me because I may not recognize you. You know I adore you, right?
Kelly?
I love this comment so much, I want to print it out and frame it.
.-= avasmommy´s last blog ..Girl Talk Thursday – Dinner For Under 10 Dollars =-.
I can’t stand BS and truly appreciate when people can just call a spade a spade. You made my day with this post!!
Despite blogging for several years now, I’ve only recently began getting involved in the social media aspect of it… and while I would love to be out there a little more, I know it takes time. And I am the only one to blame for not putting myself out there.
But I made the first step last month, and signed up for BlogHer. *grin*
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:14 pm
@jill, YAY. It really is a blast.
Thanks for this. I am going to BlogHer for the first time this year and was getting a bit freaked out about some peoples feelings about cliques. I am trying to remember, that like anything else, it will be what you make it.
I also wonder what the obsession is with “big” bloggers. I’m not going to read someone just because they are “big”. I am going to read them because I like their voice. I hope people read me for the same reason.
.-= Capital Mom´s last blog ..Wonderwall =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:15 pm
@Capital Mom, Um, it’s the same thing as wanting to date a football star I think? Popular by association? Just a guess. I don’t know. I just read who I want. Ha.
YAY for BlogHer. Week of, I’ll do a newbie post.
You know, I never got the whole blogging is like high school thing. I suppose if you enter into it with that whole mindset, but it’s not what I see. Most of who I’ve “met” online have been incredibly friendly. Then again, in high school I could see someone roll their eyes or snicker as someone walked down the hall. Here, we can do that behind computer screens. COMPLETELY DIFFERENT.
.-= C @ Kid Things´s last blog ..Phonological Delay Disorder =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:17 pm
@C @ Kid Things, Snort. True.
I think people make it feel that way, but it doesn’t need to be.
Every year when People puts out their 50 Most Beautiful People issue, I feel totally left out and bitter.
.-= Marinka´s last blog ..Who’s On First Was Easier =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:19 pm
@Marinka, I think you shoudl contact Oprah about that. I hear she picks all of them.
Round of applause. Great post. My favorite bit is about this being real life. Friends are friends whether you make them online or in person. I’ve been blogging for almost 4 years now. It is crazy how many people I’ve seen come and go. I love the people I’ve met online. I love the blogs I read and comment on. I love being part of this community. BUT, at times it gets to me and I have to step back. I’m not a drama person, never have been, so if I see drama I typically run the other way.
Oh, and I also completely agree that those that complain about this community being just like high school are the ones who are making it just like high school. We are adults, grow up and accept that not everyone is going to click with you and be your friend.
.-= Lisa´s last blog ..Preventing Preterm and Stillbirths =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:41 pm
@Lisa, Thank you Lisa.
I do that too. I step away when the drama gets a bit too deep.
Thank you for educating me on online issues! I’m not new to this per se, but defintitely new to expectations of any kind. I write my blog, like you, because I love writing, it’s a great outlet for me and I always hope that something I might say could help someone else. That’s it for me. Twitter has given me some great support over the past year – it’s something that helps me being a single mother, to have adult conversation at times.(LOL). I wish I could go to Blogher or any conference on blogging because I’d like to get ideas, learn something and make friends. No agenda here. I truely believe that what you put into something, is what you’ll get out of it – period. It’s all about having a good attitude and doing things because you have passion for them – no expectations of what you’ll get. I’m glad to be part of this wacky world and love some of the people I’m met online.
Regarding commenting – oh my gosh, if I got a penny for everyone’s blog I read when I can and commmented on, I’d be rich….. It’s not personal and like you, if I feel passionate enought about commmenting, I will. Life comes first, this is but a small part of it.
Thanks for your honesty and refreshing outlook. : )
Tricia
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:39 pm
@Tricia (irishsamom), Life before comments…good too know.
Gah, I’d be a millionaire if I was paid a cent for each comment. Over five years? Sigh.
Issa,
I’ve lurked for a while. The beautiful @avasmommy first clued me in to you.
Rarely do I have much to contribute, especially when blogs like yours are so personal & I have no clue (nor do I have any right to have a clue, since I’m just some random reader) what the entire story is.
This post, like so many others of yours that I’ve read, hits the nail right on the head. Why do bloggers/tweeters/etc. have this sense of obligation as to how other people should act towards them? Perhaps these people that feel entitled need to take a step back & reexamine how they are treating the people that they expect so much from.
Thanks for this post, Issa.
.-= Cara´s last blog ..Life is sweet =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:36 pm
@Cara, Cara? I love meeting new people. Thanks for un-lurking. I do think that people sometimes think they are entitled. Maybe. Some just think it should be easy. Like their is an easy button. And on occasion, that does happen. But it’s few and far between.
I totally get this post. I’m new to blogging and would love to have tons of friends, but I realize that it takes time. In real life, it takes time to make friends… Why would the internet be any different?
.-= Marla´s last blog ..Twenty-Nine =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:30 pm
@Marla, Exactly. Some think it should be though.
A. freaking. men.
(You just inspired me to resurrect an old post of mine. Because, seriously: well said.)
.-= Jen the Trephinist´s last blog ..Resurrected Post: The Reasons =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:29 pm
@Jen the Trephinist, I will go read it all in a bit. I love that it’s all long like mine is. I had a hard time, because it felt so long windy…however, it all needed to be said.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
I’ve been at this since early 2005. I’ve just kept showing up and over time (especially in the past two years) have made strong connections with people and somehow it’s worked out pretty well in spite of everything I didn’t do and every plan I certainly didn’t follow. I also had no expectations in the beginning so that was useful.
Oh, and writing. I’ve tried to be consistent with that, sometimes with not the most success but I keep plugging away.
I love BlogHer – the community and the conference – and every year I have a different kind of great time. I always say it is 500 mini-conferences rolled into one. I’m sure it would be a lot more daunting now to go alone like I did in San Jose in 2005, but I am eternally grateful I took that chance. Changed my life. I have friends I wouldn’t trade, just like you say, and that, to me, has been the hugest benefit. I still can’t believe it sometimes, but I’m not complaining at all.
Great post.
.-= Laurie´s last blog ..Untethered. =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:32 pm
@Laurie, I didn’t go in 06′. Chicken out. But I am so thankful that I went last year and that I get to go this year.
I got into it by accident last time, the blogging. It was possibly the greatest accident I’ve ever had.
Great points, which have relevence beyond blogging/BlogHer…
I am still new-ish to blogging and it’ll be my first time to BlogHer in August, but I think this post is freaking amazing. I’ve done some blogger meet-up stuff, and no one has been anything but nice. I think online is just like life: you get out of it what you put in. If you go to an event, grumpy and pissy that no one likes you, no one will like you. If you go in, expecting little, be yourself and let things roll off your shoulders, it’ll be amazing.
Well said, and thanks to Jen the Trephinish for sending me over here
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:02 pm
@Amy — Just A Titch, Amy, before the conference, I plan on doing a newbie survival list too.
It really is a great time. Or it was for me.
I feel left out of all sorts of things in life. Friendships, work, blogging, tweeting, etc., etc., etc. – it’s a character flaw, it’s just me and that’s who I am. I don’t think a person should be looked down upon for having these types of feelings, because they are just that, FEELINGS. I’ve had to learn how to deal with the feeling and not let it affect my daily life. The feelings are always still there, but I don’t put much worth into them any more. Yes, it still hurts, but I’ve learned that if I’m not important enough to be thought of or talked to or called or texted or invited out then that friendship/relationship is obviously not what I thought it to be and it’s not worth my time. I’ve lost lots of “friends” this way, but I refuse to be the second or third wheel. I refuse to be the friend that a person calls or texts or emails as a last resort because there is nothing better to do or everyone else is too busy. I’m important too, damn it!!! The “being left out” feeling SUCKS and I try my hardest to make sure that no one ever feels that way because of me. I may not always succeed at this, but I do try.
With so many people sharing their lives and passions and experiences on Twitter and the Internet I’ve learned that I will never be 100% happy with everyone. The Internet is a BIG group of cliques (it is, I don’t care what anyone says!) and you won’t fit into them all, but you aren’t limited to just one. Yes, as is life, when you don’t fit in you may feel left out, but you move on and find your right fit(s). You continue to search and interact until it just feels right. Eventually you’ll find your place. I have found my place with so many different groups of people. If I can find my place, anyone can!!! And then we all live happily ever after…
.-= AmazingGreis´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – Twitter Trends… =-.
AmazingGreis Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 1:59 pm
@AmazingGreis, WOW, that was a book. Sorry!
.-= AmazingGreis´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – Twitter Trends… =-.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:13 pm
@AmazingGreis, Friend? You never have to apologize for novel comments here. Promise.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:12 pm
@AmazingGreis, Greis, i adore you. I adore that you just said what you said. I had a blast with you last year and plan on it again this year. I’ve been a shitty friend lately and I’m sorry. I know this about myself. Am just beginning to think I’ll make it, ya know? I promise I’ll start working on it.
However, I am not looking down on people who feel this way. It’s the ones who create drama to have people come read their blogs. Or the ones who post about how left out they are all the time. Or the ones who seriously expect that Dooce has time to talk to them and then they go and spend tons of time saying how horrible she is, because she never says hi back.
None of those things apply to you, my friend. Feeling insecure? I get that. I do too. Often. And? I consider my self a group hopper. Nothing wrong with that. You are a genuine, caring, loving person. And that’s what I have to say.
Issa Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:20 pm
@Issa, Please ignore the mis-spelling of your name. Fingers are frozen today.
AmazingGreis Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:34 pm
@Issa, It’s mis-spelled? I didn’t even notice!
.-= AmazingGreis´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – Twitter Trends… =-.
AmazingGreis Reply:
March 12th, 2010 at 2:32 pm
@Issa, OMG, don’t apologize for anything. My novel ramble was NOT in any way directed at you, or any one in particular for that matter. I just couldn’t stop typing. I love you to pieces, and I know you have a lot going on so we may not talk or email as often as I’d like, but I understand. I, too, can’t wait until NYC!!!
I’m not feeling insecure, today anyways. It never once, while reading your post, thought any of it had to do with me. I do feel left out, yes, but that’s an every day thing with all aspects of my life. Not just twitter or blogging and has nothing to do with you. And, I definitely don’t post or tweet about it EVER! Well, unless you count the times I tweeted Justin and he never said hi back. He’s just rude! LOL
.-= AmazingGreis´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – Twitter Trends… =-.
Wow, all I can say is that you wrote what I am sure alot of people think. I absolutely agree with all of it. I am a “low-level” blogger, I get comments here and there, and I am grateful for the ones that I do get, however, I don’t expect them at all.
Hope all else is going ok for you.
HUGS
Hello, I’m here from the Trephinist and wanted to tell you this post hits home for me. Lately I’ve been struggling with my self-imposed obligation to audience (and have in deed authored one of the dreaded woe-is-me tweets–yowza! just keepin it real!)
In a previous incarnation of my blog (which has been around since 2001), I was kind of Seinfeldian–it was my goal to be part of a community and I blogged about nothing-type stuff that people found funny. I liked the community, but felt exhausted by my filter, by how much of “me” (like the stuff that didn’t fit the funny format) I was holding back.
After something not-so-funny happened in my life (that is, my husband suddenly leaving me for the woman he’d secretly been seeing the previous six months), I found it impossible to continue the Blog About Nothing b/c frankly, I didn’t have it in me to talk about nothing when SOMETHING so terrible was going on IRL.
So now I blog in a way that I feel is more authentically me, which is not always hilarious and maybe sometimes uncomfortably intimate. It’s frustrating that now my more “me” posts sometimes don’t get as many comments as the old lame superficial stuff did. I worry that my old audience is really turned off by the new stuff … BUT, I have to remind myself: my current goal in blogging is not to be an empire builder with a million blog friends; it is to write because I am passionate about it, because it is my therapy, because it is a good challenge for my head and heart. It’s simply a nice bonus that sometimes people take a moment out of their day to leave me some feedback.
.-= Hänni´s last blog ..Killing Simon Moth, Or This Is How The Writer’s Workshop Is Going, Part I =-.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:34 pm
@Hänni, You know, it’s interesting that you said that, because my previous blog was like that too. It was light and easy, I tried really hard to be funny and fit in. This go around? I just am me. Raw, real, way to honest…but me.
I think some of the people who read me before find me too…something. No idea what exactly. Some of them still read me. It’s okay, because when I came back, I’d been through some horrible things and I am just different. Over time, I’ve made new, amazing friends.
The blogosphere is not like high school at all…more like college and an insanely long greek week (not that I know anything about greek week or college for that matter) So we should totally have hazing, wouldn’t that be fun.
No?! Damn.
Love you girlie.
.-= Domestic Extraordinaire´s last blog ..Flashback Friday-The Closet Edition =-.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:35 pm
@Domestic Extraordinaire, Snort. I love you girl. Serious. That made me laugh. Greek week? Then where in the world are all the hottt mens?
I can’t wait to drag our elitist asses to Starbucks together!! (It’s just better, local coffee places, sorry.)
.-= anymommy´s last blog ..The Walk to 160 Pounds =-.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:36 pm
@anymommy, Hey, guess what? I hear that there is a Starbucks IN THE HOTEL!!!! Can you believe our luck?
I can’t wait either.
Have I told you lately that I love you?
I would totally help you hide a body. Totally.
.-= Kari´s last blog ..When they say that looking for a job IS a full time job… =-.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:38 pm
@Kari, I love you too friend. i can’t wait to hug you in a few weeks.
ps. I’d help you hide a body any day.
Wait a minute, I read all of your posts and I’ve commented here a couple of times – I expected cake in return.
When you wrote, “Just because you come here and read my words, doesn’t mean you know me…It still doesn’t mean you should expect me to do anything…”, are you saying that I’m not going to get cake?!
I’m not “involved” online so when I read posts like this I am always amazed at people’s wants and desires of what happens online, I find it highly entertaining.
That being said, I do want and desire some cake…
.-= GreenInOC´s last blog ..Congressman Campbell, Your Rock At Scorekeeping! Advocating For The People? Eh, Not So Much… =-.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:38 pm
@GreenInOC, DUDE, I just made a cake. *hands over a slice*
I loved this post! I purposefully live in a little blog bubble! I haven’t read any posts about this subject, like you have, but I’ll take your word for it. I went to Blogher last year with no expectations and had an amazing time. I’m going this year to see my friends again – and can’t wait! It will be so fun! I’m rooming with a woman whose blog I’ve been reading for a long time, but this will be our first time meeting and I’m not nervous at all – I can’t wait! YIPPEE for blogher!!! And, Issa, this is YOUR blog – VENT away!!!
.-= christy´s last blog ..Five Good Things Friday =-.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:39 pm
@christy, Thanks Christy.
i can’t wait. NYC!!!!!!
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i completely agree. it’s like “high school” if you make it that way, but i didn’t go that route there, either. i was true to myself when i actually went to high school & stayed sane because of it. i have too many friends who hated high school because of what they expected or perceived.
life is what YOU make it, friends!
.-= mommymae´s last blog ..death and all his friends =-.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:42 pm
@mommymae, Me too. I think it’s hard to do when in school…but we shouldn’t have to deal with it as adults too.
Oh dear lawd, I think I love you.
Thank you for eloquently expressing what so many of us feel. *wolf whistles*
Blogging has become a double edged sword for me. I love writing and I love the community that I have found and built while I’ve been online. But it gets really tough to keep up with the reader, the commenting and the tweeting. I’m just a girl with a computer and a few hours of free time. I can’t be everywhere, read everything and know everyone as much as I’d love to.
I do what I can do and hope it’s enough.
So thank you. Big puffy heart kisses to you.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:46 pm
@Redneck Mommy, Thank you Tanis.
Years ago, it seemed so much easier than it is now. I still love it, but some days it’s too much work. I just do what I can and hope it’s enough too.
ps. I big puffy heart you too.
I didn’t think BlogHer was clique-y last year, and I’m sad I can’t go this year. (I’ve been promised some flat Bridget pictures….that better include one with you!)
But I do think that our community is clique-y, but I don’t think that’s an all bad thing. You congregate with people who interest you. There’s nothing wrong or abnormal about that.
Read who you want when you want. Comment where you want when you want. Tweet and facebook and call or text with the people you impact you in some way. And even if that person doesn’t respond(and I’m one of those horrible people who repeatedly fails at replying to my comments), it’s out there. And, for me at least, getting it off my chest is what really matters anyway.
Love this post, and love you and your elitist ass.
xoxo
.-= Bridget´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday: My Three Amigos Edition =-.
Issa Reply:
March 14th, 2010 at 8:49 pm
@Bridget, Flat you pics….okay, i suppose that will have to do. This year.
I guess that the word clique to me, means something negative. Mostly because that is how it used and thrown around. I agree with you though. You make friends with people, that you click with. Shrug.
Love you friend.
You didn’t even mention me! *Huffs down the hall to my locker*
KIDDING. I guess I was one of those annoying people that set you off b/c I think I complained about somebody recently, I can’t remember who though. I am sure it was totally legitimate and not whiny. Heh. Anyway, you have definitely given me some perspective. You are so wise. I luffs you.
.-= Lu´s last blog ..The Zoo! Plus some other stuff. =-.
i liked high school. and, i like blogging. i see no reason to bitch about either one’s inclusions or exclusions.
I think you said it all with one word.
“Owed”.
.-= Miss Britt´s last blog ..What I’ve Been Meaning To Say… =-.