Some days I get caught up in the drama. I try not too, but sometimes there is so much of it, that I find myself helpless to stop it. In some ways, it’s easier to get sucked into the drama online, than to worry about my own life. I have a hard time shutting it off though, once I’m sucked in. A lot of things have bothered me in the last few weeks.

I feel bad about my post the other day. I was in a bad place (Some of it was because of online reasons, others were not. What can I say, I’m damaged goods people.) and was seriously fed up. By the end of the day, I sort of regretted writing it. By yesterday, I wished that I had just said, hey the kids are on Spring Break, I have two jobs to do this week and no child care until Thursday…so I may not be around….see ya in a week.

The problem is, I write in the moment. I write from the heart. In that moment, I was very upset and worked up. I feel like a jerk. I whined about the drama as I unintentionally caused more. For that? I am truly sorry.

I wouldn’t have deleted my blog. I shouldn’t have said it, because it isn’t true. Even in the moment of thinking it, I shut down the computer, left the house and texted my best friend. See, best friend law states that I have to have prior written permission from my two best friends, before I’m allowed to delete. I am not deleting. I apologize to all of you for saying it.

Your words, all of your words helped me to remember why I do this. You have no idea how much your words meant to me this past few days. I can not thank you all enough. I’d thank you individually, but I honestly don’t have the time or energy to do so this week. Just…thank you. Truly.

I do this for the community. I do this because I’ve made amazing friends, whose lives I love hearing about. I do this because I love nothing more than hearing today, that my friend Renee gets to travel to Africa to bring her son, Lion, home in two weeks. Those things? Are important. Do I need to re-evaluate how involved I get in the other stuff? Yes, I do. While I work and try not to kill my children this week, I will be thinking about that. Will I find a magic answer? No, probably not. But I’ll try to work on my attitude. Things happen…I can only control what I do online, not what anyone else does. But I have re-remembered why I do this. Truth? I never really forgot.

I write because I love to write. I write here, because I love this space. I write here for me, I write here for you. I will continue to write here. Promise.

So….let me try this again. My children are on Spring Break. I have no child care. They are with me until Thursday morning, when they leave for the holiday weekend with their dad. I have two full time jobs this week. I may not be around much this week, but I’m not going anywhere.