So here’s the funny thing. Jenna at Avasmommy tagged Liz for the honest scrap meme. The same one I did yesterday. She tagged me as well, but I’d already done it. (Love you Jenna.) Anyway, Liz and I were talking and she said she wanted to do it. I said, on my blog or yours and she said on mine. No matter what she said below, I promise you, this was HER IDEA.
I’m not sure exactly how to get her to write on her own blog, but until then, I’ve given her free reign here.
Honest revisited: Liz’s version
1. I really, really don’t feel like doing this right now. However? I told a friend I’d do it tonight. A best friend. 
We shall see if I can make it to ten…
2. I like Oreos. But only the seasonal ones. If they aren’t seasonal, then they have to be double-stuffed for me to eat them. I know they say that the seasonal ones are exactly the same as the regular ones. I don’t think it’s true.
3. I have a moderate addiction to Bejeweled on Facebook. What? You don’t think “moderate” describes it correctly? Maybe you are just jealous that my score is better than yours…? No? That’s not it? OK. Fine… Moving on.
4. I don’t drink. Mostly because I’ve never found anything that I really like the taste of. I don’t like fruit juice, so that eliminates the majority of mixed drinks. Also? It’s possible that I’m a bit of a control freak and the idea of being drunk in any way, shape, or form scares the crap out of me.
5. I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. I also have no idea when I’ll be grown up…
6. I have a very low pain tolerance. Or, you could say, I’m a big baby. Epidural for labor and delivery? You betcha!
7. When I make Thomas’ lunch, I draw a silly picture on his napkin. Some days I wish I had never started doing it because now it is expected. Other days, it makes me feel like a good mom.
8. I don’t watch scary movies. When I have nightmares, they are classic horror ones. CLASSIC. Like the serial killer is ransacking the house searching for me. Or the chainsaw murder is cutting through the door. Really. And that is without watching scary movies. Does that mean that what I fear most is fear?
9. Dark chocolate is the only chocolate worth eating.
10. I’ve been thinking about trying to start blogging again. And/or considering what I want my blog to be. And then, I look around at the laundry which multiplies like rabbits, the never ending trail of little socks up the stairs, the kitchen counter that sprouts gardens of dirty dishes from a few seeds… And I think I’m crazy to even CONSIDER blogging with any sort of regularity.
Yay! I did it! Now I’m off to celebrate with a stack of Halloween Oreos and a game (or 25) of Bejeweled.
A few weeks ago, Liz sent me a guest post, titled Mommy Myths. This weekend, she sent me volume two. Really, I think if I keep her going, I may one day get her too post on her blog again. Ha. Or give her a day a week here? hmmm, idea.
There are going to be more guest posts around here, than mine, for the next couple weeks. I hope you guys will still visit. I just need some time. I’m not going anywhere, I just haven’t found my words yet. But these people, my friends who are going to send me guest posts, they are awesome. Much more entertaining than I am right now, that is for sure.
MOMMY MYTHS #2 by Liz.
Since the first time around was so much fun… (And it’s possible that I really really really really liked getting the comments.) Or maybe it’s just because I realized I have more to say. I was laying awake in the middle of the night several days ago and this began to take shape in my head. We’ll see just how much I can recall…
1) Potty Trained does NOT equal freedom. I’m sorry. But it’s true. All of you out there in a big rush to potty train? Stop and consider this for a moment. When your two year old in a diaper pipes up and says, “Mommy, pee-pee!” or, “Mommy, new diap?”, what do you do? Drop everything and race with every ounce of strength you have to get them a fresh diaper? Um. NO. You murmur “Yes sweetie, just a moment.” and then finish the bejeweled game you are in the middle of, check email, maybe get a drink and perhaps even play another game or two. And THEN you get them the requested new diaper. Strictly hypothetical. Ahem. Now, when your small child in underwear says the same thing? You are out of your chair, racing towards the bathroom with said child under your arm before another second ticks off the bejeweled timer. Yeah… Basically, you have some control over the timing of a toddler in diapers. When they are out of diapers? THEY are in control. I’m not trying to say don’t do it. I just think you should go in with your eyes open. I have a 2 year old still very much in diapers. And an almost 5 year old who is FINALLY to the stage where he can go completely by himself–but, um… I might still have to wipe his little tush. And that’s a whole other post.
2) The Terrible Twos are NOTHING compared to Threes. I think “terrible twos” is a misnomer. Just like “morning sickness”. Morning? BWAHAHAHAHAhahaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Er. Um… Right. Where was I? Oh yeah. I think it should be “terrific twos” and “terrible threes”. Or maybe at times, “trying twos” or “testing twos”, but terrible belongs to the three’s. My summer job in high school and college was working at a day care. With toddlers. And I never knew this about the two’s vs. three’s until December of 2007. (That would be when Thomas turned three.) In my (limited) experience, two is all about cute but sometimes challenging attitude. Three? Three for us was more like, “Mommy needs a break before my heads spins all the way around” level attitude. Just because you possess the logic and verbal skills to debate every point, does that really mean you have to use it? All the time? Caroline at two gets a glint in her eye, and sets her jaw just so and then stares us down. I’m a little scared for next July.
3) The cheesy cliches are true. REALLY. When checking into a hotel recently, the young woman at the registration desk was intrigued by the fact that we were on a “Mom’s Getaway” weekend. She was… Wow. Different, eh Issa?*** Anyway, she had like a million questions about having kids such as, “So, would you like, recommend having kids?” (Feel free to imagine the head bob/tilt and the twirling of the hair as you read that.) “Does it like, um, change your life and stuff?” Oh, and of course, “Was like, having a baby the most intense thing like, evah?” And as Issa and looked at each other and tried not to laugh out loud at her, we had to answer truthfully. A million times yes, I would recommend having kids. It changes your life in the both the most mundane and unexpected ways. And, becoming a parent (no matter how it happens) is without a doubt the most intense thing ever–er, excuse me. I mean evah! Is it all sunshine and roses and puppies? Goodness no. Not even close. It’s a lot of sweat and tears. But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
***Issa’s note: That woman….err adult girl, shouldn’t have kids for another 15 years at least. I’d fear for her children’s lives. She’d be the woman who’d leave them in a cab, because she got in a conversation on her phone about a magazine article. Or she saw something shiny. Scary, truly. A few minutes after we left registration, which by the way took FOREVER, Liz and I considered that we should have told her having kids was horrible, just so she wouldn’t do it.
Months ago, I asked Liz if she’d write a guest post for me. She said no. She may have even said, hell no. Brat. She had her reasons and as her friend I had to not bug her about it again. Okay, maybe I did a few times. Like once, twice…okay maybe every few weeks. I told her that she could have the keys anytime she wanted. My place is her place. I wasn’t going to hold my breath though.
It’s a mark of a true friend when you wake up one day, on one of the crappier weeks of your life, to find a guest post sitting in your inbox. One that you didn’t even think to ask for. One that makes you cry, because somehow it was exactly what you needed. I am a wreck this week, people. It’s not something I am ready to discuss yet. I will in time, I’ve seen too that. However, now is not the time. I’m not going anywhere and I’m sure I’ll post something on Friday for Harrison’s first birthday. Just give me some time okay?
Today, for me, please read what my best friend sent me this morning….late last night. One of those. Be kind to her. I’d really like to encourage her to start writing again on her own blog.
Mommy Myths-
So, nearly 5 years ago, I became ‘Mama’ when my first child was born. A boy. Cuter than all the rest–no really!! You should have seen him. 5 weeks early. I was woefully unprepared in SO very many ways. For one thing? My hospital bag wasn’t even packed yet… But aside from the logistical preparations, I was also behind the game in the more emotional aspects. And, looking back on it, I’m pretty sure that nothing could have changed that. It seems like aside from actually stepping through the experience myself, there wasn’t a way around it. So, here is a list. A list of things I wish I had known, but wouldn’t have believed even if you told me. Take it or leave it.
1) Babies are TINY and scary. I had done my share of babysitting. In fact, in high school and college my summer job was working at a child care center. So, when it came to taking care of a baby, I figured I could handle it. Baths? Feeding? Diapers? No problem. The truth? The truth is that I found myself TERRIFIED. Totally and completely. In fact, when we got home from the hospital, we had to move the bassinet over to my husband’s side of the bed. I was too afraid to have it on my side. I could not stop checking to see if he was still breathing. I could not stop worrying about how much milk he was getting and was it enough and when was his last diaper and was that within the normal range? My husband likes to say that babies are like animals. They can see in the dark and smell your fear. It sure felt like it…
2) Breastfeeding is not all rainbows and kittens. I don’t have much to say about this. I’m not here to tell you what to do. I just want to say that I did it. It was the right choice for me. For us. For our family. And I didn’t love it. It was hard. And painful. And exhausting. Did I enjoy it? Sometimes. Was it amazing and a “real bonding experience”? Sometimes. Did I frequently wish I wasn’t doing it? Yep. And did I feel guilty for being so happy when I weaned both kids at about 8 months? YES. I guess what I really want to say is that parenting is about trying and making the right choices for you. And having the support from family and friends to keep from second guessing yourself too much. I don’t like the nagging feeling of “coulda, shoulda, woulda”. Make the best choice for you and have faith in yourself. It’s all about confidence–something I generally lack.
3) You can’t do it ALL. Serious. Serious, SERIOUS. This one I am still struggling with in a big way. Not humanly possible. At least, not for THIS human. When my daughter was born two years ago, it took a FULL six months before “I just might be able to do this eventually” entered my head. Yeah, it took six months before I even thought that in passing. Not “Yeah! I’ve got this mastered!!” Not “Two kids is hard but doable.” The simple, I *might* be able to do this SOME day. I don’t want to hear how you have X number of kids and your dishes are washed every night and the clean clothing is always folded and put away where it belongs. That hasn’t been my reality. Our house is generally a mess. My brain is pulled a million directions every day. I have a running “to-do” list in my head that seem infinite. And I look around at the showered, manicured people driving spotless cars and wonder why does it feel so hard for ME? I have a full time job. My husband has a full time job. The kids are still young. We are juggling a lot. I’m learning to adjust my expectation of ‘realistic’. At the end of the day, the kids are loved, and fed. And most of the time bathed. Some of the time at least. And the dishes? They can wait for another day. Really
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