When you are three and a few months…
You can tell a roomful of family at a birthday dinner that you are allowed to touch your penis in your room only. Not at the table. In your mind, they all needed to know this. They will all laugh.
You will ask for apple sauce, have a tantrum about not wanting apple sauce and then eat the apple sauce all while your mother looks at you still trying to decide what to say.
You think that the red car with the smiling teeth grill is a real car from Cars. You will then proceed to tell everyone you see that you saw the real life Lightening McQueen.
You will teach your baby cousin to “say his name” even though you’ve somehow forgotten that Baby G’s real name isn’t Baby G.
You will Tebow everywhere because your daddy taught you how. Everyone will think it’s funny. Even when done at the grocery store and someone nearly runs you over. You get a pass for being three and cute.
When you are seven and a half…
You will read The Tale of Despereaux and then watch the movie and want to discuss the differences at great length. Your mother will find this amazing and tell all of your grandparents.
You will get grouchy at your mother for not managing to stay awake for this boring beyond boring of all movies on any viewing. But hey, she’ll still gladly discuss the slightly less boring book at great length with you.
You will come home each day with stories of who lost teeth today. You will yet again ask if you are the only person in the world who will forever have baby teeth. The answer of course is yes and then you’ll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for only adult with all baby teeth.
You make the Harry Potter Knight Bus out of Legos and then take it apart to do it again, at least twice a week.
You claim that every food in the world is inedible. There is rumor that you live off air and jokes. The only food you want at any given meal is either one we are just now out of or possibly one that doesn’t yet exist.
You tell better original jokes than most high paid comedians.
When you are ten…
You yell at your siblings if they even look at your perfectly built Hogwarts Lego creation. You’d never consider taking it apart. It was a one time deal that you plan on enjoying looking at forever.
You take up texting. Or more technically iMessage. You will text both of your parents non-stop. (Or what feels like non-stop to them.) Even when sitting on the couch next to them. It’s cute. In a, sort of getting old, way.
You figure out how to add a signature to your texts, which neither of your parents know how to do. You change it on a day to day basis, depending on your mood. For example, yesterdays signature was: I’d like a kitten. Texts tend to look like this: Hi! I’d like a kitten. What are you doin? I’d like a kitten. Mommy can you change the chanel? I’d like a kitten. Can I watch Idol? I’d like a kitten.
You decide to learn to bake. Muffins are your current favorite.
You will sob when your favorite skier passes away from a head injury. This was the first time a hero of yours has died and it has made you incredibly sad. It’s a first that I wish I could have protected you from. Thankfully it has not made you fear skiing.
You will one day announce that it’s high time Harrison learns to read. The fact that he just turned three and still screams each time someone makes him blow his nose makes no difference. You are going to be the one to teach him. What follows is a lot of entertaining attempts at getting him to look at the letter and word cards that you have made up. He in turn makes them into weird ramps for his cars. This will be a process.
When you are thirty one…
You will want to hug every single person on the entire Internet for their kind words this past week.
You will laugh hysterically at an ill placed hanging fairy during a procedure.
You will tell the nurse when she asks you to tell her if it’s uncomfortable, how about I tell you if it hurts…because we are way past uncomfortable now. I mean see where you are and the entire army of medical instruments up my…yeah. Stopping now. Uncomfortable. She did laugh though.
You will decide to quit coffee cold turkey. Not because you don’t love coffee, because oh you adore coffee, but because in the moment you know it’s the right thing to do. Even after the headache starts you won’t give in…because some things are more important than a cup of coffee.
You buy Girl Scout cookies from the cute six year old girl at the door on general principal. You don’t even like GS cookies, but a few boxes now reside in your cupboard.
You will finally delete the six posts sitting in draft form. If they weren’t worthy then, they surely aren’t now.
You will thank everyone who still comes and reads here 600 posts later.
7 Comments1. I am currently addicted to Lucky Charms. While there are better and worse things I could be eating as a dessert, I don’t really care right now.
2. My current app obsession is W.E.L.D.E.R. I’ve managed to turn Morgan and my mom onto it as well.
3. Right as I was leaving to get my kids last night, I heard a huge noise in my basement. In the end what happened was the hot water pipe to my hot water heater exploded. No, I really mean exploded. It shot holes through my wall. My ex husband managed to temporarily replace the pipe (with some kind of metal tube deal) so I had water last night and this morning. I have a plumber coming in a bit to actually fix it. I had to call my insurance because there is just tons of damage. There is a company coming in to do something to my carpet. Pull it up? Dry it? Not sure. Something. Let’s just say yesterday was a pretty bad day.
4. Last night I gave myself my first shot. I cried. But I did it.
5. This week has kicked my ass from here to next week. I am super freaking stressed out right now. I’m not sure I can handle anything else in the next few days.
Please note that I stole this idea from Jodifur. Hey, at least I ask before I steal post ideas.
It’s come to my attention that the remainder of this year is going to be COMPLETELY INSANE, so I believe it’s time to post and call an end to my posting for 2011. I promise I’ll be back in January. Hopefully with some changes around here. Anyway, before I show you my favorite posts of this year, I thought I’d wish you all a wonderful holiday. Whether that is Chanukah, Christmas, Winter Solstice, Kwansa or just New Years, I hope you enjoy it. Whatever you celebrate, I wish you health and happiness for the remainder of this year.
In January, I made a goal to remember the good in this year. To count my blessings and try not to be such a pessimist. It’s a goal, I’m happy to say that I’ve managed to accomplish over time.
In February, I found out that I have PCOS. It’s changed my life in many ways and I’ll be honest, it’s not all bad. It’s nice to know that certain medical things in my past had reasons. It’s made me less hard on myself. I also love this post about enjoying the small things in my kids lives. Days go so fast and some days, I do wish for a second Sunday.
While writing this post on my step-mom was hard in March, it also led me back to therapy to deal with a few things that I thought I’d let go of. It’s nice to say now, that I have let go of a few issues. It’s helped make this a better year for me. I’ll never forget things that happened when I was a kid, however I don’t have to let it color my world any longer.
April brought my 500th post, which I chose to write for my best friend Liz. I love her even more now than I did then, so I’m glad I gave her that milestone post. April also came with big decisions about the brother I’ll probably never know. I am confident in my decision. Finally, there was the list I made to insure the kids and I had a great summer. I am thrilled to say, I managed to accomplish my goals.
In May, I head great news about Morgan’s future in fifth grade. I have to say, she’s had a phenomenal school year. Her teacher is amazing. We owe her so much. Luckily, because my kids go to a charter school, Morgan will have her next year as well! I also told you all about my lunch date with my dad.
Parenting isn’t always easy, as I realized yet again in June. Making the hard choices is something I am willing to do though. A part of June, I’d rather forget but never will is when the evil clown ate my blog. I’m still thankful to Jenna for fixing it. Also in a funnier post, I shared some text messages I get. Even now, they crack me up.
In July, I got off my anti-depressants after four years. There have been times when I wondered if I could stay off of them. But we’re halfway through December and I can honestly say, I’m doing great right now. On the 18th, my Bailey turned seven. She is one of my very favorite people in this world.
On a random day in August, I wrote about my step-dad for no real reason. Just because I love him. I also went to BH11 and my BFF trip. It was one of the greatest weeks in my year.
September was a harder month for me. I’d rather not re-visit it, except for this one tiny thing. My baby boy turned three. He’s so very three and I adore him for it. Most of the time.
In October I celebrated making it through the first year of divorce. A strange thing to celebrate, yes maybe. However, in my quest to change how I think, I had to look at the bad, to remember the good.
In November, I did quite a few things that scare me. It was a hard month emotionally, but luckily I came out okay on the other side.
December has been very busy. I’m loving ever second of it. For the first time in a long time, I’m truly happy. My baby girl turned ten and had an amazing party. I’m looking forward to everything that we have planned for the next two weeks.
My wish for all of you is a wonderful next few weeks. I’ll see you in 2012.
Love, Issa
I figure if Nic, Miss and Adam do it, I can too. This may actually be a hard one, seeing how I’ve been online for six years. What can I possibly not have told you? We’ll see how well I do.
1. I drink everything with tons of ice. If it’s lukewarm, chances are good I will not drink it.
2. When I was ten I had my first paid baby-sitting job. It was for my piano teachers kids.She adored me and thought I was responsible enough to handle her two kids. Once a week she paid me to watch them for three hours. She always told me, if you need anything go to the house two doors down. It took me six months to need to do that…when I finally did, for some odd reason, I found them having dinner with their friends. Yep. They went there once a week. Two doors down.
3. I am a channel flipper. I watch three shows at one time. It makes most people insane. However, my girls do it too. They so get me.
4. I have to be pretty much dead to nap. No really. I mean it. 103 fever and I can sometimes nap. But that’s pretty much it.
5. I organize my mother’s trips for her. Business and pleasure. She tells everyone it’s because I am Internet gifted and she isn’t. But mostly? It’s because I feel like if I do it, she will somehow be safe and magically end up home just fine on her scheduled flight. It’s lame, I know…but I’ve been doing it since I was 16 years old.
6. I am not afraid of flying, yet I’m terrified of heights.
7. When I get angry, I cry. Every dang time.
8. I am allergic to paper. And Ink. My hands rash and swell when I touch paper for too long.
9. I used to surf. My dad taught me how when I was seven years old.
10. I can water ski and jet ski. I love water sports.
11. I will never be able to deep sea dive. I have the ears of a four year old. Or specifically one very bad ear.
12. I despise winter sports. Which is funny since I now live in a state with 6 months of winter.
13. I hate talking on the phone to 99.9 percent of people. I’m pretty sure texting is the greatest invention ever. I average 4,000 texts a month.
14. I have an addictive personality. It’s why I am very careful to not drink. If I will listen to a song for a week on repeat, order the same thing every time I go to a certain restaurant or eat the same thing for lunch for years, imagine how quickly I could become an alcoholic.
15. I am a neurotic kitchen cleaner. I clean as I go and my dishes never sit there for long. However it’s the only thing that is clean in my house most of the time.
16. I have an inability to own an umbrella. I think it’s likely because I rarely mind getting wet.
17. I will hand pick mushrooms and green peas out of food before eating it, however any other thing I will leave even if I’m not overly fond of it. I can eat around most anything except those two nasty vegetables.
18. I listen to music from the second I wake up until I go to bed. It’s on most of the day, unless the TV happens to be on.
19. I have a turtle tattoo on my left calf. I don’t regret getting it, but I’m not sure I’ll ever get another one.
20. I once broke my butt by falling on the beach. Literally.
21. I sleep with ear plugs. Even when I have newborns. I have phenomenal hearing. I hear my kids through the ear plugs. Without wearing them, I can’t sleep because I hear every noise in a mile radius.
22. I never wear make-up. I never have either.
23. I name everything. My iPhone, iPad, car, desktop and Kindle all have names.
24. I have never grown out of my love for kid food. I love PB&J, hot dogs, Cheetos and Popsicles. However I will also eat most anything.
25. I always have trouble thinking of the last item on a list. It’s like a disease. Yet at the same time, my light organizational OCD won’t let me send an incomplete list.
I have an entire post in my head. A post about my amazing experience at BlogHer; about old friends and new friends; about taking a little boy to the beach and the experience of sitting on a couch for the first time ever with my three best friends. This will all be said. Just not today.
Today I’d like to talk about how I managed to get to BlogHer this year. Or rather how you may want to think about how you can get there next year.
The conference location for next year was announced before I’d even left my hotel room Friday morning. What can I say, I’m slow to get ready. The tweets started immediately. People pissed at where it was. People thrilled at where it was. People wondering why it wasn’t in their city. No offense to anyone, but Kentucky, Nevada or Texas are not places I want to go in August. I was a bit annoyed in the moment by people, but I decided to shut down Twitter and move on with my day. BlogHer does the best they can with it. The location will never make everyone happy. They need places near good airports. They need huge convention centers near multiple hotels and tons of restaurants. They look for cities that people will enjoy. Mostly? They have to find some place that will take us. This is just a guess, but bloggers aren’t known for being nice. Social media has made us all big complainers every time we dislike anything. If you were a big hotel/convention center, are you sure you’d want us there?
That all said and done, the real thing I’d like to talk about is the reality of cost in going to BH. I think people make it out to be much more than it really is. I’ve heard people claim you need $3000 to attend. If that were true? I’d never of gone. I think going to BlogHer is possible for most people. Not all. I won’t claim that anyone can save the money for it. I do know though that if you want to go next year? Why not start trying to save now? It’s easier than just complaining about how horrible expensive it is on Twitter during the entire conference. (And the entire month prior.) It’s easier that admitting defeat the second the next years location is announced.
I want to try and break it down for you, if I can. I want to take a bit of the mystery out of it. Maybe then, you can come next year. Or the following year at least. Maybe then you won’t be that person on Twitter complaining about the #BlogHer11 tweets, while never bothering to mute the hashtag. We all know curiosity and jealousy and sadness some how all get jumbled up together. However, when you say you can’t go the second the following year is announced, most of us do not feel bad for you.
Sorry. I know I’m being harsh. I’ve also been doing this blogging thing for six years. That’s six conferences. I’ve only been to three of them. I get what it’s like to sit home and wish you were there. I do. But I’d made the choice to not go those years so I had to just let it go.
Anyway….here’s what I know:
Plane tickets are generally cheapest if you buy them on a Tuesday or Wednesday. Two months out is best. Mine cost me $156. I had a lovely friend who was stalking all airline websites for us to find tickets. Now, please note that I flew out at 7am on Thursday morning. That meant getting up at 4am, yet I did it for a cheap flight. Last year my flight to NYC cost me $256. That’s pretty dam good for NYC. I also got up super early that year.
A full BlogHer conference pass costs $160 if bought today. It will go up to $200 around February. You can also look into volunteering for them, which means working about 6-8 hours over two days and they’ll give you a full pass for free. There are student rates if you are in school. There are also Party/Expo only passes which I believe are pretty cheap. Under $70 I believe. I’m considering doing that next year.
BlogHer always get a certain number of rooms at a discounted rate. They filled up about two month prior to the conference. They are $199 a night. Sounds horrible, I know….however Hilton/Marriott/Sheraton are the hotels they pick and to stay there is always higher than that. My hotel room this year cost $340. That was three nights and I didn’t share my bed. We only had two to a room. Next year, I will likely do 4 to a room, which would be $170. That’s the cheapest way to do it and it’s always like a big slumber party. Pick your roommates wisely and it will be the best three nights of your year.
I saved money to eat out at nice restaurants. You don’t have too. I know someone who only spent $7 on food this year. She’s like the BH food wizard or something. She ate the meals the conference provided. She drank the coffee they provided. She made her dinner out of the appetizers served at parties and snacked at the Expo and in the hallways of the convention center. There was always food out somewhere this year.
It’s doable people. It’s possible if you want it enough.
To go this year, I gave up going to Starbucks every day. I took up making coffee at home. I took a hundred dollars a month and put it aside. Please know that I went to California for a week, so I needed to save more money. That included me renting a car and driving to LA to spend three more nights with best friends. That included me eating out at phenomenal and somewhat pricey restaurants.
I probably spent around a thousand dollars total. Which is insanely expensive. I understand that. However? I lived big. I took tons of spending money. You don’t have too. You can still go and do it small. Hell, I still have money in my wallet to replace my car battery which is completely dead.
If you want to go next year or even the following year, start saving now. Put $50 aside at the beginning of each month. You don’t have to put $100 aside. Stop going to Starbucks or using RedBox. Downgrade your cable one tiny step or turn off Netflix. Put down the shoes that you don’t need a few times. Eat in one more time a month. Eat cereal or grilled cheese that one night instead of ordering pizza. Each time you do that, take that money and put it in a jar. You’d be surprised how quick it adds up. Don’t use your change when you use cash. I put all change in a large Pepsi tin. All year, I put any change in there. That was how I had spending money for this trip.
If you want this, you can make it happen. If not? If you’re not willing to at least try, then you feel free to complain about each tweet next summer too. But at least be willing to try, if it’s something you want to do.
1. In almost a week exactly, I will be landing in San Diego for BlogHer11. I wasn’t going to post about it at all, however curiosity got the best of me. Who’s going? Who wants to try and meet up? It can be hard to find people in a sea of 3,000 people. It was near impossible last year to locate people and it was all in one location. This year, there are people spread out over two hotels and the convention center is in a different location. Basically, what I’m saying is, let me know now if you’d like to try and meet up. You can always DM/Email me when I’m there. I am one with my iPhone.
Last year, I only went to two events the entire weekend. The Voices of the Year and Sparklecorn. I had a teeny love affair with NYC. It was near impossible for me to be in the hotel. NYC called to me. This year, I have sessions I plan on attending as well as parties. So I will be around a lot more. (I love San Diego, but I’ve been there many times.)
My only advice that I’ll give is be you and try to step out of your comfort zone and bit and talk to new people. You never know who you will meet. Most people at BH are super nice. Really? We’re all geeks who spend way too much time online.
I will be the one in capris, t-shirts and flip-flops giving out mini-moo cards with sarcastic sayings on them. Come say hi if you see me. I’d love to meet you.
ps. I will be hosting the Serenity Suite on Saturday from 2-3pm.
2. Last night it came to my attention that I am incapable of re-reading Berenstein Bears books for the third go round. CANNOT DO IT. Reading one last night made me want to gorge my own eyeballs out. With a spork. However, my tiny son has finally grown tired of his Cars, Toy Story and dump truck books. So he started looking around at other things and found a huge stack of the bears books. Those bears have to go. I need to buy him more books though. I’d given away the girls toddler/preschooler books. Or most of them. The bears will somehow be given to my ex. Let him read that crap.
I could really use suggestions on books your kids love/loved at 2-3 years old.
3. At some point in the last month or so, I finally relented and let Morgan put Radio Disney as a preset button on my XM radio. It annoys the crap out of me. Not just the music, but the NON STOP commercials and talking. THIS IS XM RADIO PEOPLE! I pay for it, so I don’t have to listen to that crap. If I wanted to listen to constant talking, I’d listen to REAL RADIO!
It’s a mark that I’m getting more patient and nice though as I age, that I put up with it. The girls have this new thing of constantly asking me if I like an artist. It doesn’t matter which station. They want my opinion. On Radio Disney, instead of saying, hell no this is all crap and it’s making my ears bleed, I say oh she’s okay. Or, I don’t mine this song. See? Growing up. Heh.
4. I am learning something new at work. It’s a challenge to learn new things at times, but I’m sorta happy that I am. Means my brain isn’t as atrophied as I sometimes think it is.
5. One week till vacation. I am taking a week off. BlogHer first and then a few very much needed BFF days after. I truly can’t wait.
Complete darkness is all around me. (Black out blinds, best investment ever.) My bed is comfy. Soft sheets, even softer blankets. My air conditioner is set at the perfect temperature. I have no reason for being awake. I just am. I wonder to myself for the seventh time that night what time it may be. I reach for the iPhone on my side table and stop myself before I pick it up. I have a strict don’t look rule when I am like this. It’s worse to know what time it is. If I don’t know, I can tell myself it’s only midnight. If it’s midnight I have tons of time to sleep enough to feel human. I know I’m lying to myself. It’s still better than knowing that it’s 4:22am. Or 3:46am. Or whatever time it happens to literally be in the moment. When I know, I figure out how many minutes it is until my alarm goes off. That is a guaranteed way for me to not sleep. I toss and turn the rest of the night anyway.
I haven’t slept well in a week. The only night I slept all of the way through, I took two Benadryl. I’m contemplating doing that again. My kids come home tomorrow after a week on vacation with their grandparents. I need to sleep.
My head pounds all day long. It’s a pre-migraine headache. It hasn’t turned into a migraine, yet I can’t get rid of it either. No matter how much water I drink or Advil I take, it won’t leave.
I went through a few days of being slightly nauseous. Now, I’m eating everything in sight. I believe that last part is PMS, but really I’m guessing.
I am irritable. At everything. At nothing. I get on and off of Twitter. Mostly because you all breath. Literally. I’d like to give a real reason, but I don’t have any. Everything annoys me. Which is odd, because I can ignore most things online. When things annoy me, I hit that pretty red X. Yet, right now, everything annoys me. I’m finding myself grouchy non-stop.
I just yelled at my dog. Because I tripped on her bone. Yeah, she was asleep across the room. I am thankful my kids haven’t been here for a week. I’m sure pissy, yelly mom wouldn’t have been fun for them. I’m hoping I can keep myself from being like that when they come home tomorrow.
I send emails and after a week of no response I wonder what I did wrong. Sigh. This is the part I hate. The over thinking. The believing it’s always about me. It’s not me. I am sure of it. But I have trouble not jumping to that first.
I’m half the time so spacey I can’t remember why I got up and the other half the time there are so many details in my head, I can’t write them down fast enough.
I’ve been off my anti-depressant a week and a day. Awesome side effects huh?
The weird thing, is that the irritability is what bothers me the most. I hate being that person that is grouchy at everyone and everything all of the time. I hate watching every word I say, just to make sure I don’t spew my irritation at others. The rest I can handle, but this annoys me. Ha. I’m annoyed that I’m annoyed. Fun times.
It’s not as bad as I thought it would be, the side effects of withdrawal. I feared the anxiety and so far, I’ve been mostly okay. It’s not pleasant, that is for sure. Yet, so far? I can do this. I have not gotten depressed. I have not had a panic attack. I think I can deal with the rest of it. I need to keep myself in check at times. But because I’m aware of how I am, I’ve so far managed to do this. I’m being hyper vigilant right now.
Anyway, I wanted to share. Because you all have been here with me for years and you deserve real. What I posted yesterday? Total crap. I know this. It was my need to not feel like I was over burdening anyone. Yesterday was a bad day. Today will hopefully be better.
I keep telling everyone I’m okay. And I am. Not great, not bad, just okay. I’ll take it right now.
This, by the way, is my theme song right now. Not sure why, but it just seems to sit well with me. I thought I’d share.
Maybe a month ago, I saw a post that Chris did on her out of context text messages. Sometimes the best part of my day is reading back the texts that my best friends and I sent each other that day. I thought I’d share some. These are all randomly picked from the past month.
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Yep. She’s an itty bitty.
PSA: Nyquil is strong. One shouldn’t take it and then not go to bed. Unless one likes walking into door jams.
Ice cream requires no cooking or cleaning.
That is called attitude diva four. Welcome to my life
I just mopped my kitchen. Mostly because bubs peed everywhere. I just said, uh bud, you have to tell me before you pee, not after. He goes: otay mama, i do dat next time. Snort.
McD’s and DQ. I win at dinner.
No joke a monkey just got hit, fell, bounced on one of those little life rafts and ended back up where he was before.
I just made hot dogs on the grill. Heh. I’m awesome. I’m impressed I could turn the dam thing on.
The Dollar Store is a strange and terrifying place.
I fought a bed frame and the bed frame won.
Yes. But a very nice guy pushed the car into the gas station. I mean, I got dam close.
Am going to plant now. Wish me no child killing luck.
Yes. You need those bad boys sharpened.
Kittens are bad for motivation.
So it’s Holy Crabs??
Nachos. Want. The end.
I am a very wise woman. Knowledgeable. All that.
I may be a wee bit drunk.
I’m at Walmart. And I’m dressed like I belong here. I am ashamed.
Oh mad chillin for days.
He’s a handful. Like triplets.
You iz special.
On the: Issa’s trip to Lu’s floor of LA tour?
FYI: I have tiny fingers.
I’m super excited to get my sparkle back.
All four of us together? Epic.
H: Mama, I bery sad. Me: Why my bud? H: My poly-poly dies. Me: Oh yeah. How’d that happen. H: I step on him.
I’ve been asking A what she wants to eat for dinner. Her response at least 3 times now? I want to eat Dora. Either I’m raising a cannibal or a lesbian.
Girl still needs Etsy Anonymous.
Dude. I want to marry my artichoke dip. I wonder what our babies would look like?
You may be the least hate-able person in the entire world.
For some reason these children still expect me to do things like feed them. Water them. Somerthing.
Delivery Preschool. That’d rock.
But everyone needs a large pink blow up shark, right??
This last one was an email from my mother: “Melissa Annie, what are the exact numbers when one says they require a “butt shit-load” of photographs. This is not a number either P or I are familiar with. Please advise. Love, mama”
Is she always like this? Her words vibrated through my brain for weeks afterwords. It wasn’t the words themselves. It was the meaning behind it. This, being crazy. This, meaning disruptive and impulsive. Being crazy screaming tantrum girl. Truth was, yes. She was always like that. Pretty much the entire year she was two. It could change in a moment. It often did. Her words floated through my head, because they matched some of my own words. I felt like a failure as her mother. I couldn’t stop the behavior anymore than a daycare teacher could.
She’s so needy. There are 15 other kids in this class. I shouldn’t have to spend all my time on your daughter. Maybe she doesn’t belong in daycare. Yes, that’s the answer to all of our problems. She doesn’t belong in school. I wanted to bang my head against a wall. Instead, I changed her to a different school. A better school. Didn’t change the issues. The teacher just happened to be a bit easier to deal with. The idea that a three year old would be better suited to stay home all day would have been funny. Except it wasn’t. Yet…her words stayed with me too. Because I felt the same way a lot of the time. I had this bubbly, happy, mellow six month old, who was getting the shaft in a lot of ways. Because her big sisters HUGE personality always came first.
The impulsiveness is our biggest issue. That and that she constantly gets the entire class going. I understand, I said. I did. She did that at home too. She constantly was at odds with her sister. With me. With her father. Yes, I know the impulsiveness is an issue. I’m doing the best I can. She’s four, I told the teacher. I’m doing everything I can and she’s fighting me on all of it. Because she can and because well…she’s four.
She’s so smart. How do I teach a child this smart? How can I keep her busy, if she already knows it all? What? How can I tell you how to teach? I am not a teacher. I don’t know how to teach small people. I only know how to mother them. I am her mother. You are her teacher. Figure it out. I know she is smart. I know she is ahead of all these kids. Intellectually only though. However? She’s five. She needs to be with these kids. Her emotional stability depends on it. Hell, mine does as well. She was doing so much better by then, yet here was a teacher intimidated because she was ahead. Intimidated by my child. Awesome.
She can’t sit still. She’s constantly making noises. I just can’t handle the constant clicking. Sigh. Here we go again was my thought. It’s a pen. She clicks a pen, right? Yes. I can’t handle it. Okay. I will find something else for her to mess with. You have to understand that she doesn’t even realize she’s doing it. I do, I really do. But that clicking makes me crazy. Okay. Yet again, I will find another way for my child to not be herself. To change who she is, to fit the mold. I don’t say that. I just think it. Because you can’t change a child’s second grade teacher, halfway through the year. You just have to find a way for everyone to get along. The answer that time was Adderall. It made a world of difference. In Morgan at least. The teacher never forgave her or me for the pen clicking and other miscellaneous ticks. The ticks Morgan had from trying too hard to sit still. From trying too hard to be like everyone else.
Issa wait. Wait up. I have something to tell you. She ran up to me in the parking lot of the school this morning. I’d just dropped the girls off. Hey S, what’s up? I got her. I am so happy. I got her. She’s mine. What? I’m confused. Morgan. I get to teach her next year. You aren’t supposed to know, but I just had to tell you. I am beyond thrilled. She was my first pick and I got her. I feel the tears but I blink them back. Thank you S. Thank you for telling me. I’m so glad she got you. I wanted her to get you. She hugs me and runs back into the school.
All these years, there have been teacher issues. Even at times this year, despite the teachers understanding and liking her. Because my kid, she’s amazing. She’s sweet, caring, funny and bright. She’s a challenge though, even on her best day. She’s highly intelligent and she gets bored easily. She’s opinionated and articulate and in all honesty, she’s smarter than me. She has ADHD and though she is medicated for it, it causes other issues. All these years and this is the first teacher who fully understands. She is a semi-friend of mine and she adores Morgan. She also understands her, because she is just like her.
Finally. Someone wants my daughter in her class. Finally.
***Updated because of a conversation of Twitter.
1. What’s the ring tone on your phone?
2. Are you going to BlogHer this summer?
3. If you have an iPhone or really an iAnything, what is your current favorite app?
4. What do you normally eat for breakfast?
5. Can you swim? Can you ride a bike?
*****
My answers: (because people always ask when I do this)
1. Michael Buble, I just haven’t met you yet. And I’m sick to death of it.
2. Heck yes. Can’t wait.
3. Mine is a tie between You Don’t Know Jack and Angry Birds Rio. Rio will win, once there are new levels. NEXT WEEK!!! Ahem.
4. I need something new. I was eating granola and yogurt, but my stomach can’t deal with the heaviness of granola right now. I’ve been making banana bread every week, but I’m starting to get tired of it.
5. Swim yes. Swimming is a must when you grow up in Los Angeles. Bike riding…um nope.
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